"First Cocoa and now Aurora..."

 

Sighing as I shut my locker, I cast my gaze toward the wide, double doors that allow access to the school with a far-off look. When Aurora never showed for the rest of the class, I decided then and there I'd try to investigate as to her whereabouts, but I didn't even know where to begin. But if my hunch was right, she'd probably be after Cocoa right after their tussle just moments earlier.

 

After wrapping up at my locker, I trudge toward the doors, not really showing any oomph, feeling drained as my mind racing with what I would say if I come across Cocoa or Aurora. How I would react when I spoke to them, rather with anger or compassion. Aurora wasn't the highest rated person in my books, but I still wanted to know why she abandoned class and Cocoa was my friend...at least I think she still is. My curiosity never let me rest, but it wasn't only that she never showed that was tugging at it. Something that was definitely unlike Aurora. She had less bark and bite to her, which was very out of character for her in the short time I've known her.

 

"Hey Random," an upbeat, male voice calls from over my shoulder far down the halfway toward the exit of the school, causing me to come to a halt. He was a measurable distance away between a walk and jog toward me, but I knew who it was; it was Cody, but why he'd come to me now I could only venture a guess at.

 

Wanting to not brush him off twice in one day, I turn around to face him, muster the best smile I could manage, and tell him politely, "Hey Cody, what's up?"

 

Judging by his expression and the way he starts to fidget, I could tell he wasn't confident enough to share what was on his the remainder of his mind from the conversation we had during lunch. Probably afraid of being rejected twice in one day, and I could only sympathize with him... I've felt that way an equal amount of times or more. He probably thought I wanted nothing more to do with him today, but possibly still felt like something was unfinished, or he wouldn't rush over so hastily.

 

"So what's on your mind?" I ask him, mostly to break the silence between us.

 

"Well... It's just Aurora," he replies shyly, his eyes wavering from mine as he speaks, like it's something that shouldn't trouble him but does. I wished he'd just spit it out; as mean as it'd be to say, I do have other things I need to tend to.

 

But still, if he was interested in knowing more about Aurora, and I needed to track Aurora down myself, having someone there with me would make it more bearable. Knowing I'm wasting precious time, I lace my hand with his, causing him to shy away, and tell him frankly, "Cody, just tell me on the way home, okay?"

 

It takes him a few seconds to register what I relay to him, still lost in the process of jumbling the words in his head into a coherent sentence I'd wager, but when he does become aware of what I say, he nods and together we continue down the corridor and head through the double doors.

 

As we begin our walk down the sidewalk, a decent distance between us and the school, neither of us exchange any words. Minor glances in his direction show that he's either lost in thought or in a trance, almost walking along mechanically. I was hesitant to say anything, but the silence was eating away at me. Many of the other students around us interacted normally with each other, laughing or sharing jokes, but it felt like we were mimes lost in a sea of rainbows. Not standing it any longer, I begin to open my mouth to say something, when Cody interjects quietly with, "It's just... It's something about Aurora. But not just her..." Unlacing his hand with mine, we continue to walk together, silence taking back its place in the air between us.

 

We soon pass by Dan's Hot Chocolate and I try to gesture to him to head inside so we can talk in a quieter environment, but he doesn't seem to notice, head lost in the clouds, almost literally. He seemed to be starring at the clouds as they drifted breezily overhead, like they held the answers to his hazy mind. It was the same look I've also had time and time again, so it was easy to guess for me. however, looking at him just kept reminding me of my past, and resurfacing things I thought I'd long forgotten about. I found it to be unsettling, and he soon appeared to be bored with our walk home together and began to take off toward the direction of the park. I soon follow after him, curious as to see what he was up to. Sometimes I found my curious nature too much to handle for my own good.

 

As we past under the metal arch to the park, me following slowly behind Cody, he takes the trail along the clear blue pond reflecting the sunlight, ducks swimming lazily about within. As I follow him, his eyes seem to watch and follow the mother duck as she tends to her two young ducklings.  One of them appears to be learning to swim and fumbles the first few attempts, submerging under and then resurfacing. The other one seems to have gotten the hang of it, swimming fluently around the other in a mocking sort of way. That's when my mind finally clicked and I remembered Cody had an ill mother and watching the mother duck must remind him of his mother when she was healthy. My heart began to ache at that point, as I've been pushing him away when he was probably in pain himself and trusted me enough to talk to me about it and I've been nothing but an insensitive jerk. Maybe that was the reason he wanted to come here; to show me through example if he couldn't find the words to tell me, knowing that the ducks would be here.

 

"Hey, Cody..." I whisper as I try to approach him, the guilt starting to affect me.

 

He seems to not hear though, or pretends to ignore me as he heads over to the small playground in his same mechanical manner. I swiftly follow after, beating myself up as I do so for ignoring him. He needed someone to console with, and I shoved him aside for my own selfish ambitions.

 

When we reach the playground, he slowly heads over toward the swings, a clear sign of loneliness painted across his solemn expression. But beneath that was a thick layer of responsibility and a hint of being lost on what to do with said responsibility. I only know his feelings because when I first woke up here they were my own...and I can see myself reflected in him, at least most of myself. It was then I knew what to do, what words to say to try and ease his worries.

Maybe it was Cocoa's kindness rubbing off on me, I couldn't say for sure.

 

As he takes a seat in one of the empty swings, I decide to jump in the one next to him and kick my feet off the ground to propel me backwards, kicking up a small dirt cloud as I begin to slowly swing back and forth. He looks at me with a strange gaze, but I shrug it off and enjoy my hair flowing in the breeze as I remove the hair tie keeping it trapped in a ponytail. Up to this point I've felt lost myself, unsure of how to approach my friend or how to talk to my rival, but seeing Cody in a similar state boosted my spirits and I felt a small weight being lifted off my shoulders. Somehow just swinging here felt strangely soothing, almost like I did it when I was younger. And to some extent, I can recall those moments locked away in the deepest reaches of my mind.

 

"How can you be so carefree?" he asks me coldly, like he didn't want me anywhere near him. "If you don't want to listen you can go home."

 

Well so much for cheery. But I didn't let it upset me. He was only acting out this way against me because his life wasn't going so well. But neither was mine, so I couldn't come up with a retort to his question that would defense my position. So I quickly wrangle up another approach to the question with a more compelling answer.

 

"Look, I'm sorry, I really am," I tell him as sincerely as I could as I swung back and forth, enjoy the gentle breeze. "But I know how you feel-"

 

"No Random, you don't!" he spits vehemently, and I dig my heels into the ground and grind to a halt as he begins to stand abruptly, looking like he was ready to explode with outrage with how livid he appeared. "You live too carefree a life to know what it's like for me, taking care of my family, watching after them. Last I heard, you don't even have a family here."

 

Not letting his words affect me, as much as they sting, especially the last part, I also leap out of my swing and stand my ground in front of him. Standing this close to him I finally notice how tense and stressed he was, a coiled up wire tightened to the point of suffocation, like he hasn't had a moment to relax in  ages. I may not have a family... Well I guess I do if I think about it; Cocoa has been like a sister to me for almost four years now and I could never replace her. And Dizzy... No, I could think about her right now.

 

"Look Cody," I tell him it strait as I stare eye to eye with him, "I DO know how you feel; it was how I felt when I first came here. I felt alone and lost when I woke up here three years ago with almost no memory of who I was or where I came from. To this day I still can't recall who my parents are or if I have any more of a family outside of them. You should be glad you have a family who cares about you, even if you can't do everything single thing you can for them. That's...what family is for, I think. To help you. I don't have one, so I wouldn't know."

 

I don't really know how well my words impacted him, as he just stood there speechless as to how to reply. At that point I turned around and crossed my arms, thinking about how I've never really snapped at anyone like that before except Dizzy, and that was because she kept pushing me to my limits of tolerance. But I still missed her...

 

"Still," he starts, bringing me back to his attention, causing me to turn around. "I've been...trying to hide the fact that I'm...blacking out and everything."

 

After he finishes his sentence, he begins pacing back in forth, almost as if he's lost as to what to tell me or how to describe it. That maybe it's too perplexing and he hasn't had anyone to communicate with about what's been going on, causing it to build up to frightening levels and then collapse in on him . I felt honored that he was willing to tell me, but at the same time I couldn't think of how much help I'd be. Cocoa was way better in situations like this than I was.

 

As soon as he stops pacing, Cody returns his attention to me and says more calmly than before, "I'm sorry I yelled at you, Random. It's just been really stressful lately because, you know, I'm basically second in charge of my family. There's my older sister, Cindy, but I think she's wrapped up in her own doubts. Remember how I told you Aurora's glowing rock may be affecting me?" He asks, pausing so I can respond, but I just nod, finally putting my own selfish thoughts and desires aside to listen intently on what he's willing to share with me.

 

"Well, because she's so occupied with our mom and because I have school and a side job on top of that, I can't really ask her this question." He lets out a deep sigh before continuing. "And everyone else right now is content with how things are and I don't want to burden them with something beyond what they're capable of understanding."

 

He pauses once more, probably stringing together the rest of his jumbled thoughts into a straight line of something more coherent than what he's babbling. But I think I already know where this is going, and on top of what I've been as a friend-or girlfriend, I was still unsure at this point-I had my answer at the ready whenever he'd man up and ask me.

 

"Well, I don't know how to say it..." With a serious look on his face, he turns toward me, stands firmly and says without hesitation, "I want you to help me figure out what that rock of Aurora's is. If it's effecting me, and not in a good way, I need to know why."

 

He steps away after he's done and cast his gaze back toward the pond forlornly. Without having to process the question, I nod in full agreement when he looks up toward me, and most of his fear he's been wearing like a suit of armour begins to come off, replaced by his bright, white smile.

 

"Thanks Random," he tells me, relief washing over him. "I just... Feel like I know that rock, but I don't know from where. I feel like I'm supposed to do something with it, that I'm going to be closer to it than I want to be with no choice but to. I want you there when that happens."

 

Even though he's finished, the whole idea sounds eccentric to me. But with all the crazy phenomenon's that have been occurring, it does fit into the realm of possibility. And I needed an excuse to get closer to Aurora. Then I immediately slap myself for thinking that way; it was to help Cody, not gain something from it. But if the two happen to correlate down the same road, I wasn't against the thought.

 

"Sure, I can help. I don't know where we'll begin, but nothing ventured nothing gained, right?" I tell him with elated enthusiasm, throwing both my hands into the air turned upward. I didn't know why I was so happy to help, but I guess it was because of my second agenda, but I tried not to show it.

 

"In case you're wondering, the main reason I'm asking you is because your friend Cocoa seems to be so close to Aurora, so I thought you'd be able to help me get closer to her that way, as one idea."

 

I knew he'd say that eventually, but it didn't hurt any less. Using me to use my friend Cocoa to get to Aurora, it was a good way to go about it, but I just felt like a pawn. But Cody must have sensed how I was feeling, as he began to move closer to me till our bodies were only inches away.

 

"Sorry, but I don't think Aurora would talk to me otherwise..." he says soothingly, even if I find it a tad uncomfortable. Not that there was anything wrong with him; he was amazing, gorgeous even. But something felt...off. I couldn't focus on it though as he then began to lean in to kiss me the moment I did. My heart beat began to pick up in speed at that point and I quickly scanned my thoughts for the best solution to this. On one side of things, kissing him would have been pleasant, but after telling me I'm basically no more than a pawn, the thought kind of gets diminished. So without seeming too rude, I gently put my finger to his lips, indicating not here, not now. His expression then returns to that of a sad puppy, but I didn't feel pleased with where it was going.

 

"Sorry," I tell him, not sure how to explain what I feel. "Just... not now, okay?"

 

He nods but doesn't respond. I could only assume he was wanting to kiss me to forget about the problems that cling to him, but I wasn't going to stand there and be more of something he could use... He was in a tough spot, and I'd do what I can, but not like that.

 

"See ya tomorrow?" he asks after walking passed me toward the park entrance. I turn and call back yes as he disappears into the distance. One more problem added to my list of random recurrences. But this one was intertwined with what I was trying to accomplish, so I didn't mind it as much. But my mind felt scattered with the events of today, and I needed to relax. Too much to handle at any one given time and I felt so confused my head was ready to erupt.

 

Seeing as it's not too late judging by the sun, and the fact that my minipad says it's 5:20 pm, I decide to head to the spot where I first woke up here with no real memory of who I was. It was odd that the place where I began my life in this city was the one place I could feel most at peace.

 

After arriving I take my usual place in the center of the forest just under the open gap in the center that gives way to the sky above. It's been a while since I've been out here, but it gives off that same feeling of sereneness as it always has, easily calming me down and lulling me into a state of tranquility, allowing my mind to slowly drift about and connect everything together. Pulling my legs toward my stomach and wrapping my arms around them, I try to sort through everything.

 

"Cody... Cocoa... Aurora... Dizzy... So many people I'm mixed up in with. It's no different from a few years ago. I seem to always end up in a series of events leading to something. Only I have no idea where the trains going to crash into the black hole this time... Mom, Dad, what would you guys do?"

 

Turning my eyes toward the sky as I ask the question, my mind dives back to a time of where they could be if they were still alive, of what they'd look like. A day hasn't gone by where I didn't think about them, but it feels like it's become less and less with all the other things happening. But I didn't want to completely forget about them, even if it's been only three years. If they were here, would they give me advice? Could I talk to them or would we just argue like Cocoa's parents?

 

A gentle breeze begins to flutter through the forest, disturbing the nearby animals and rustling the leaves. I gently turn my head toward the trees and watch with curiosity as two squirrels scuttle up a tree as the leaves rattle, soon concealing them within. I always forget how quiet it is out here. I eventually wanted to drag Dizzy out here, but now that I think about it I don't think nature would suit her personality all too well. She seemed so into robotics and machinery, I looked like a beginner next to her.

 

"What am I supposed to do..."

 

Nothing was really in my control, and I never had the best reputation for making and keeping friends. Most people I did know were through Cocoa, who was like a friend magnet. I was lucky to meet her when I went to school. She was the only one who acknowledged my presence and didn't find me too nerdy or geeky. Everyone else avoided me like the plague.

 

"It's funny how being here is making me reminisce about my life. For me this is all where it started... The rest of my life I just can't recall. It kind of sucks."

 

Feeling once again more emotional than I have earlier, I can already feel the tears trying to surface and deciding if I want to fight them back or just let it happen. I just felt like the world was crumbling around me and I couldn't find anyone else facing a similar problems. Anyone I did want to talk with was busy or it just didn't feel like a point in time where I could insert it into a conversation. Eventually I just succumbed to the tears; there was no fighting them this time.

 

I must have sat in the forest for a good hour or just under enjoying the quiet nature and gentle breeze, crying a river the entire time. I felt so pathetic afterwards, but I felt a whole lot better. I've seemed to have developed this habit of crying for long periods of time. I've just never felt so stressful. I needed to find a way to get my mind out of its hazy clouds and focus on something that will distract me from everything going on. So I decided to head home and come up with a new project.

 

On the way out of the forest I tried to think of something to come up with. With no on-going projects at school, I was left to my own-quite literally-devices at home. One thing that had been nagging at me was a way to top Dizzy. I felt inferior to her and felt the need to try and get one over on her, in a friendly way of course. I didn't hate her; not anymore. And if I could ever see her again, I'd tell her that without wavering.

 

Melding into the crowd of other people heading home from a relaxing afternoon, I soon split away from them and head down the concrete sidewalk leading toward home which also held the entrance to the junkyard. Every time I've walked by since Dizzy's disappearance I've often wondered if she really did enter the junkyard and I just can't locate her or if she left town or even returned to her family. Too many possibilities were at play and I couldn't deduct from such little information.

 

A few yards from the junkyard I stop mid step and notice a figure emerging from the darkened shadows of the entrance. From this distance I couldn't discern who the shadowy figure was, so I decided I should get a closer look. But I thought twice about it when they pulled a small, glowing rock from their satchel and began to examine it like it was a rare find. Then it hit me and I knew who the shadowy figure was. Aurora had just acquired another one of her rocks. Now I know I needed to get close enough to at least listen to what she was saying.

 

Quickly assessing the area around me, I decide to hide behind the shed where the gate keeper sits, carefully avoided his gaze as to not raise suspicion. I didn't need him thinking I was crazy. But even at this distance I still couldn't hear a thing; her sounds were too muffled by the oncoming traffic. It just had to be the end of an average work day.

 

As I sat there I quickly tried to formulize a way to pick up on her voice from over the cars, but I didn't really have anything on me I could rig up as-

 

"Right!"

 

Sliding my backpack off my shoulders, I unzip it and frantically search inside for an old microphone I used as a test build for Tipsy's speech recognition system. It was able to pick up very specific things across great distances and cancel out what I didn't want. Voices were the one thing I had to encode differently otherwise she'd pick them up differently than what I what I'd have intended her to have, which would have made for very weird conversations. But right now if I could use that frequency with my built in mixer in my minipad, I may just be able to hear what Aurora's whispering about.

 

After plugging it in and configuring it, I aim it toward the position Auroa's standing in and pray a miracle manages to surface. When I start to hear faint whispers emanating from my minipad's speakers I know it was a success. I had to fine tune it and adjust it a little, but maybe now I can learn what she's been up to.

 

"Even so, this stone should output the power necessary to reach my specifications... " she whispers, turning the stone over and over in her hand.

 

Has she been using it to power something? Or is she channeling its power?

 

"Even not at full capacity it used to work just fine. If I don't get this finished soon, the deals off..." What deal did she have? Too many questions.

 

Gripping and concealing the stone within her hand, she turns her head slightly toward my direction and then the junkyard. Of the few times I've seen her there, she'd always have that rock. It was like her only natural resource of it. I still had no idea what it was or what it did.

 

"Could she have been right? That this stone has lost its power and only now retains a fraction of it?"

 

Without taking her eyes off the junkyard entrance, she pulls out a small, flat, rectangular device and points the front of it at the glowing rock. Seconds later the screen begins flashing and appears to be outputting specific data. She scrutinizes the screen intently as the readout continues to show information at blinding speeds. If I was closer, I could probably deduce what is was showing her, but from here I can only guess so much.

 

"It's showing the same power reading as if it were one of the originals, so why... It doesn't make sense. Even if the stone was a fake, my analyzer would tell me it was. It reads and breaks down minerals to a base compound and searches for errors within it and whether its weaker or stronger than others."

 

Shoving the analyzer back in her satchel, she turns the rock over once more in her hands, as if looking for flaws in its workmanship. From this distance I couldn't make out what she could possibly be looking for. As she stood there my curiosity was getting the better of me; I wanted to know what that rock was. I wanted to know what she wanted it so badly for.

 

Returning her gaze to the junkyard longingly, I can only imagine what could have happened within the dark depths of the junkyard. I've never seen her look so questioningly about anything before. She's usually the first person to answer any question thrown her way without so much as an invitation, so seeing her hesitate was a rare sight. One I fear I took too much pleasure in...

 

"Damn it!" Aurora yells in frustration, forcing my mind back to her presence. "I don't care how long it takes, I'm not stopping. Fake or not, I've got too much involved in this to back out now... There's nothing left for me to go back to. I've got nothing to lose. Except for-"

 

Suddenly ending her sentence, she tears her gaze away from the chain link fence of the junkyard, pockets the glowing rock and begins making tracks down the opposite direction of the sidewalk from where I'm hiding. I'm guessing she's going home, finally done standing in front of the gate and talking to herself. I begin to do the same, finally done listening to her conversation and place my microphone and minipad back into my backpack. Slinging it back over my shoulder, I slowly stand, somewhat stiff from crouching for so long, and start to head home. But out the corner of my eye as I begin to turn around, I notice another figure exit the junkyard, the remaining sunlight glinting off her chocolate brown hair. It was Cocoa.

 

Upon seeing her it felt like a waterfall of emotion slamming into me; I nearly lost my balance at the sight of her. Her and Aurora both went to the junkyard, and something happened causing Aurora to leave before hand was my assumption, but Cocoa looked to elated for an argument to have broken out between them. So why... Shaking my head to clear the thoughts, I decide to approach her casually, as if I just left school. Only as I play out the situation in my mind, I find it going over quite differently in reality.

 

"Hey Cocoa, what brings you out here?" I ask her in a friendly way, causing her to jump. She must be hiding something; she seems way more jumpy than normal.

 

"Random, hi, what are you doing here?" she ask defensively, as if trying to cover up something.

 

"Just on my way back from school. Cody wanted to talk so it took a little longer than I anticipated." It wasn't a complete lie at least; we did talk. "But what brings you out by the junkyard?" I ask again, jabbing my thumb in the direction of the entrance.

 

She begins to point her foot toward the ground and bring it in circles, a sign she's nervous, which is odd for her as she's never nervous around me or afraid to tell me something. It actually drove my emotions toward the negative side of things; was she unable to trust me? Not wanting to push the issue further, I waited patiently as the silence between us intensified, neither of us wanting to shatter it. Eventually she does break it and says quietly, "I was... just walking by and happened to notice Aurora and she asked if I could help find her glowing rock. It took us quite a while."

 

Even though I'm hearing her words, it just didn't sound logical. She'd left school nearly three hours ago. If she happened to walk by and notice Aurora even a half hour later, did they really spend two and a half hours searching? I didn't know whether to believe her or not; she was clearly keeping something from me. But if she could tell Aurora and not me... I didn't know how to feel about that. My emotions have been on a roller coaster all week, and they've met the height requirement every time.

 

"Random?" Cocoa ask while tapping my shoulder, showing clear concern for my perplexed state. I couldn't process the situation though; my heart was taking preference over my head. "You okay?"

 

Hearing her words at a distance, I try to contemplate being second fiddle to Aurora. The realization of it was disorienting, and the more she spoke the more I couldn't hear; she was lying directly to me, putting on a facade to hide what she was truly conspiring.

 

"Random?!" she yells loudly, throwing her hands on my shoulders and shaking me, waking me from my pensive state. "Hey, what's wrong? You can tell me, you know," she says with a joking mood, clearly displaying concern but tries to play off her deceitfulness. In that instance I felt the bond between us crumble slightly, as if the trust built between us began to wane.

 

"It's...nothing Cocoa," I tell her, disregarding my thoughts in the process. If she couldn't tell me the truth then I was more than willing to reciprocate the feeling.

 

"I'm going to head home. I'll see you tomorrow?" I ask with raised eye brows.

 

"Of course," she says with a cheery smile, tilting her head to the side. "Do you have to ask?" she follows up with smugly. But my heart wasn't in it.

 

After waving goodbye, I head down the cracked, stone sidewalk, the tears returning to the surface at an overwhelming level; my heart felt shattered and I didn't know what to do about it.