When school finally let out I was more relieved than any other day I could think of. More so because I was able to be with Cocoa again after not spending time with her for the past 3 weeks, which really left a large hole on the inside of my stomach that I couldn't quite explain till she showed up at lunch today and it started to fill in, like a missing piece of a puzzle was finally found and inserted, completing what was once unfinished. During which she didn't tell me what her and Aurora were doing, but I didn't push the subject too much as I didn't want to start a fight between us again. Especially one that didn't involve Aurora at all, otherwise it'd be 100% on me and I did not want that, not after we were back on speaking terms. At least speaking terms where neither of us were yelling or angry at the other for one reason or another.

 

We talked and talked even as we headed out the school doors, catching up on any last minute things we couldn't or didn't cover in the lunch room. Even if it was crowded and loud, we didn't want to chance be overheard, not over what we were discussing. In fact, we were so caught up in reminiscing that I completely forgot about Cody and how he told me he'd meet up with me after school and then feeling bad the second I remembered it. He was my boyfriend-which still felt strange saying-and I needed to honour his request because, he honoured mine.

 

“Oh know,” I whisper, tossing our current subject aside and stopping in place, causing Cocoa to abruptly stop as well. She turns toward me, a confused look playing across her face. “I forgot about Cody; he wanted to meet after school.”

 

After it clicks inside her head as to why I stopped, Cocoa then tosses her head side to side in a sweeping gaze over the school grounds before doing a 180 to see if Cody was anywhere outside to be found. Then she returns her chocolate brown eyes toward mine and says, “I don't see him, maybe he went home?” she adds, honestly thinking he went home.

 

Casting one more glance around the school grounds, I begin to wonder if he really did go home. If he knew I wanted to spend the day with Cocoa then maybe he decided to give us space, to allow me time to catch up and then patch things up with Cocoa. Well, whatever it was, I hope I didn't hurt his feelings. I've spent a lot of time with him these past few weeks and I didn't know if he wanted to keep hanging out and then go home or if he thought I was crazy for having him search for someone who he probably thinks doesn't even exist.

 

Returning my attention to Cocoa I say, “Maybe he did go home. You never know.” I shrug, letting her know it doesn't really effect me either way. Truthfully, I wanted to spend the day with her, no matter what we were doing. I had a lot more I wanted to catch up with her on. A lot more I wanted to talk about. So I asked, “Want to get some hot chocolate?”

 

She tosses me a confused look and then nods, finally cluing into to what I asked. I guess she hasn't gone that much since she's been hanging out with Aurora, which I find hard to believe considering it's her favourite thing in the world. But after watching how Aurora treated her, I guess she didn't have a spare moment to go grab a cup. So without a moment to spare we headed off.

 

“Cocoa!” Dan bellows as we walk through the door. “I haven't seen you in ages,” he exclaims as he finishes polishing off a glass mug and then sliding it under the counter to join the others. “Where have you been?” he asks, confirming my suspicion of her not having been here in a long while, possibly the three weeks I haven't really talked to her.

 

“I've...been busy,” she responds, squirming uncomfortably as we take our seats at the counter. “Haven't had much time to come by and grab a cup.”

 

Her answer causes Dan's jaw to drop. He's known her for far longer than I have and, from what he's told me, she was in here almost everyday asking questions and trying out new drink ideas as well as suggesting her own. That and she always told me how she loved this place more than anything else in the world and wanted to run it herself one day, to pass on all the crazy ideas she'd written down at home alone in her room. It was just too much a shock to hear her not coming here since she's been hanging out with Aurora that I continued to stare at her for several seconds before shaking my head and returning to the present.

 

“It's a sad day when you don't stop in,” he says, more so to himself then her as he turns toward the row of dispensers on the right hand wall, grabs two cups and fills one with dark chocolate (for me I'm guessing, since it's my favorite) and the other with a dark brown and cherry red swirl before adding in some kind of red topping to it. He then turns back toward us and slides the dark chocolate my way and the cherry swirl one toward Cocoa. She looked down at it and then at Dan, a quizzical look playing across her face.

 

“Just came up with this the other day. Chocolate Cherry Rocket I call it. Been waiting for what feels like forever for you to come in.” A big grin flashes across his face, like this is his greatest idea yet.

 

I turn the stool toward Cocoa so I'm facing her as she nervously takes a sip, then watching as her face first twist into something unrecognizable before settling on something of a cross between a dream and a paradise. Smacking her lips and setting the cup back down, she tosses a look between both of us before saying, “It's your best combination yet, but it could use something a little more bitter to tone down the sweetness of the cherry topping.” She nods in approval before taking another sip, and I do the same with mine, forgetting it was right next to me.

 

“I've been waiting for that sort of insight, Cocoa; no one around here knows their stuff like you.” With a smile he returns to his work as Cocoa drinks halfway through her hot chocolate.

 

“I missed this place,” she murmurs as she finishes the last bit of her Chocolate Cherry Rocket, a look of reminiscence on her face.

 

“So why didn't you come here while you were with Aurora?” I ask and then see the calm on her face get replaced with one of emptiness as she turns toward her empty cup of hot chocolate. I then turn away, starring at my own glass as I whisper, “Sorry, I shouldn't ask.” I bit my lip; it was questions like that I have been wanting to avoid, but my curiosity always got the better of me, sometimes in the wrong situations, like this.

 

She then turns her head back to me and shakes her head, hair flowing in front of her face before she readjust it and says, “It's okay, I was just so busy learning business from Aurora and helping her at her house that I hadn't really had much time to stop by here, that's all,” she ends flatly, giving no more room for consideration or second thoughts. “Once you finish we can head to the junkyard if you want.” It felt like she wanted to tell me more, but we both just left it as it was. Neither one of us wanted to push the other too much, at least that's how it felt to me.

 

After finishing a rather awkward moment at Dan's, we continue on our way to the junkyard. I had decided to take my hot chocolate with me, not having the stomach to finish it while we were there, but still wanting to have it with me regardless. Halfway along the way, sun slowly sailing in and out between clouds, I catch a glimpse of someone with what appears to be blue hair just across the street from the entrance of the junkyard, fiddling with something that looked like an iPad. That's when my head starts racing with thoughts of who it could be, and they all always seem to fall on to Aurora. On why she would be here, of all days, just standing across the street. That's when I see her cast a glance our way then return her attention to the device she was holding just as quickly, possibly hoping I didn't notice. That's when I start thinking, I hope she didn't see us. That she wouldn't cause trouble today, that I'd be able to enjoy an afternoon with Cocoa. But as luck would have it, she pockets her device and waves a hand toward us. But she doesn't move, just stands there staring our way almost like a deer in headlights, frozen on the spot.

 

And that's when I know; she wants to talk to Cocoa. She doesn't want me around when she talks with Cocoa either, when she talks about whatever it is that they talk about anyway. And my suspicion is confirmed when Cocoa starts to head toward the curb, looking both ways up and down the street to make sure it's cleared, then casting her gaze back my way saying, “I'll be right back,” before crossing over to meet her. And during all of this, all I could do was stand there and watch. Stand and watch as Cocoa once again leaves me to go see Aurora and my mind reels back to the thought of how she can see the good in Aurora when I couldn't, when all she did was cause me trouble. But I try not to pay them any attention as I cross my arms over my stomach and sip my hot chocolate, turning my attention toward the junkyard.

 

“So did you tell her?” Aurora asks, flipping her hand through her long, pink streaked, dark blue hair. “You know, that I told you you could go back to her and talk to her like normal again?”

 

“Yeah,” I nod, scratching my arm and turning toward Random, noting how she isn't liking the fact that I'm over here one bit. That I told her we'd spend the day together and now I'm in a conversation with Aurora. Or rather a silent one as nothing but the wind between us is giving indication that there is any sound between us at all. That's when I speak up and say, “What do you want, Aurora? I promised Random I'd spend the day with her, so whatever it is you have planned can wait. Even you said I could spend the day with her, or do you not remember what you told be in your bas-” she holds her hand up, palm open toward me, stopping me right there and indicating that that topic goes no further. I guess she doesn't want anyone to know what's down there.

 

“I know what I told you,” she says indignantly, lowering her hand to her side. “Look, just don't talk to her about anything you've seen or helped me with, understand?” She crossed her arms across her chest after finishing, waiting for a response.

 

“I won't, Aurora,” I say, slightly annoyed. “Look, are we done? Random's going to be wondering why I'm over here.” I cast a glance back toward Random then return my focus to Aurora.

 

“Whatever,” she shrugs and then turns away, taking out her device from before. “Just,” she turns around one last time, the frustration gone from her face now replaced with one of concern, “please don't Cocoa, I don't need her...” she trails off, leaving me to fill in the blanks. I know her secret and she doesn't want Random knowing about it for whatever reason, but because of it she's promised to leave Random out of her affairs for the most part, which included letting me spend time with Random.

 

“I won't, Aurora,” I tell her as my annoyance starts to wane. “I promised you I wouldn't. Random's my friend, but so are you.” I nod, hoping she'll know that I wont tell Random, that I don't go around spilling peoples secrets.

 

Without another word she continued off, looking down at her device the whole time, avoiding pedestrians like a professional skier going through slalom gates. She must have done this her whole life living here to do it so effectively. I wonder if she ever walked together with friends and not staring down at something electronic. I didn't have time to question it though as Random was waiting, so I turned and walked back across the street to where she was standing.
 

“Weeellllll,” I say to Cocoa after she's back, drawing the word out as long as I can, letting her know that I'm a little annoyed about how she promised to spend the day with me only to have Aurora call her across the street. “What did she want?” I ask, cocking my head to the side.

 

Before returning an answer she points her left foot toe down toward the ground and starts to trace a small circle, then grabs her left arm hanging at her side with her right arm. That's a sign I've grown to know that she's going to avoid answering with a straight answer and use an indirect one that's close to the truth but also a ways off. But I guess I couldn't force it, so I wait there till she's ready to talk.

 

“She just wanted to talk,” she finally says, breaking the silence. “Anyway,” she regains her composure before continuing, “shall we continue into the junkyard?” Sighing, we walk past the entrance and head inside.

 

When we finally enter the junkyard the conversations between us die as we take individual directions to search, her heading east and I heading west. Her chipper personality from earlier disappeared after her conversation with Aurora and was replaced with one of a sort of distant feeling. It made me feel a little sad on the inside to see her like this, especially after we agreed to hang out today. I was debating in my mind whether to ask her about it or not, but I wanted to respect her space and not have her really be angry at me, but at the same time my curiosity was nibbling at the back of my mind, so I decided to ask anyway, hoping I wouldn't regret the answer.

 

“So Cocoa,” I start, walking up behind her, “why so quiet?”

 

She turns toward me with a smile on her face and says, “no reason, just...not much to talk about.” She cast her gaze back over her shoulder to continue looking, clearly indicating she didn't want to talk about it. Sighing, I shrug, turn around and continue searching. I just couldn't comprehend what went on between her and Aurora.

 

“If I was attacked by myself in a nightmare fit, where would I hide?” I exclaimed, half to myself, half to Cocoa who was busy shuffling around other mounds of junk. We'd been here for the better part of an hour with no real results to speak of. The sun was slowly starting to fade behind the clouds despite it being only 4:30 in the afternoon. Too early for night, yet still unusual for a summer afternoon. The wind also began to pickup. Thankfully, my hair was in a ponytail, otherwise it'd be whipping across my face, and that annoyed me, especially when I was working on machines. “A little windy today, huh?” I shout over toward Cocoa who I assumed was still not far off behind me. “Cocoa?” I call again as I turn around, sweeping my gaze over the junk mounds and not catching a glimpse of her chocolate brown hair anywhere. That's when I realize I'm standing there alone, a sudden chill running down my spine as I wrap my arms around me, almost giving myself a hug. Not just to ward off the increasing wind, but for the fact that I was alone, Cocoa no where in sight as if she disappeared into thin air.

 

I didn't know where I was wondering to, but I needed time to think, so I left Random and went down a path that I don't remember either of us ever venturing down before. I didn't know why, but I felt drawn this way, as if an invisible force was tugging at my arm and guiding me. Or maybe it was just the wind pushing me from behind. Either way, one thing the wind was doing was knotting my hair as it tossed it around my head like curtains to an open window, which obscured my vision from the path more than once. If it weren't for the invisible force guiding me, I'd probably would have gotten lost a long time ago. All I could think about along the way was how I was abandoning Random, but for some reason I knew I had to go this way. There was no ifs, ans or buts about it.

 

After a few minutes of what felt like endless walking, the mounds of junk started to shape themselves from simple piles to things that almost resembled structures, like homes and trailers or even caves. It wasn't even an immediate change either; everything looked as if it was slowly reshaping from the inside out. Almost as if someone were rebuilding it to their specifications. Microwaves looking brand new sat on top of counter tops, computers and monitors that were on the “Log in” screen sat on planks of wood that were learning and robots were running and hiding whenever I got too close. Whoever, or rather whatever was out here, obviously has time on their hands. As I got closer to the center, the structure started to form a more stable home made of thrown away electronics, fixtures and other knick knacks I recognized in a normal home. That's when I was sure it was definitely expanding outward, not just in one direction like I originally thought, but in multiple directions, fixing and piecing together more junk as it continued to expand almost by itself. But I'm soon broken out of my amazement as I walk just outside the center of it all to find what appear to be lasers pointing directly at me.

 

“Who's there?” ask a small, monotone voice. Almost robotic? Maybe female? “Speak now; my lasers don't like waiting.”

 

Their lasers? “Um, my names Lilly, but everyone calls me Cocoa. Who are you?” I ask hesitantly, hoping these lasers don't go off unannounced. And much to my surprise, they're retracted just as fast as they came out. I breathed a sigh of relief once they weren't pointed at me anymore, now replaced by silence. So I stood there, waiting for the voice to announce themselves once more, but nothing more came from within. After another minute, I decided to enter inside to try and find where the voice came from. And I was immediately blown away. It looked like a down scaled version of Auroras lab, minus the giant tube of liquids, wires scattered everywhere, screens and monitors and scientist moving about. Okay, maybe it wasn't anything similar, except for the far wall furthest from the entrance containing an alcove of a monitor and computer screen, all of it surrounded by a sphere like building which seemed to indicate the center of everything happening around it. Next to it was a robot who was diligently working on making sure it wouldn't fall under the weight of everything overhead. As I inched closer though, avoiding the various machine parts scattered along the floor-which reminded me of Random's bedroom-I noticed a small figure in the shadows. They were working on something, probably unaware of my presence.

 

Tentatively I walked up behind them and placed my hand on the rim of the small alcove to maintain my balance as I leaned down to say, “Um Hi, I'm Cocoa, were you the one who-”

 

Before I could finish, a small robotic looking bird zipped by my head from where they were sitting, causing me to yelp and jump back, almost falling over. That's when the figure looks up toward me and I see she's a female, probably around 12 or 13. I'm about to speak again when she gets handed another machine from the robot and begins to disassemble it, carefully placing each part down in front of her in an organized fashion, making sure no harm comes to them. She almost reminded me a little of...Random...

 

“You're Dizzy,” I say after the realization sets in. And yet I still find myself half expecting a no; she looked way to young to be around our ages.

 

“Yes, and you're Cocoa, Random's best friend, correct?” she asks as her hands never waver from her work, her same monotone voice washing over me and causing me to shiver. Everyone had emotion in them, right? She sounded more robotic than anyone I've ever heard. I don't why, but I got a sad feeling inside me as I stared at her possible emotionless face. Maybe I can get her to show some emotion. It must be a lonely life without expressing joy or anger or even jealousy. “Is Random looking for me?” She asked, jolting me out of my thoughts.

 

“Yeah, she's just out by the entrance. I can go get her if-”

 

“No!” she screamed, but it was still in monotone and still she never wavered from her work, almost like she was in a trance. “I... I don't want to talk to her...”

 

After she finished, for the first time since I've been standing there, she stopped working on the machine and set her tools to the side. She then brought her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them, almost as if to block off everyone and everything around her, including me. I noticed her shoulder length hair hung around her like a rain coat, starting at the ends of her eyes and circling her head all the way around, just brushing her shoulders. She was in a sleeveless t-shirt that was wrapped around a light blue duster sweater and had on midnight purple jean shorts. Her expression was dark and far off, as if she didn't appreciate the topic one bit.

 

“Or not,” I whisper, dropping the subject.

 

Her postilion remains unchanged as I stare at her, debating if I should tell her what Random told me. Anything to break the awkward silence between us really. I felt like a stranger in a foreign land standing there. I was brought here for a reason... Maybe she was it?

 

“Random's told me,” I finally speak up, hesitantly taking a step toward her. “About the nightmare I mean.”

 

That's the second reaction I've gotten out of her. Her head darted my way and I could swear she was giving me the death stare. But odds are she was looking through me and at Random who was probably still looking for her, and now looking for me as well. Her expression then changes back to normal again, like nothing had happened.

 

“So you know...” she whispers. Maybe I'm finally getting through to her; she's starting to open up a little anyway. “That Random cannot keep her promises... That I had trusted her the first time, but the second...” she trailed off, lost in thought. But Random not keeping her promises? That's something I couldn't believe.

 

“Random's not one to break promises easily, you know,” I tell her, hoping she'll see it from my side. She seems like the one to look at it one way and only one way. “She's honest and kind.”

 

“Emotions...” she mumbles, returning to her work. “Let me ask you something then, Cocoa. Do you know why I work on these machines, why I've chosen to stay here in seclusion instead of around random? Why I have this mark here that has only begun to fade yesterday?” She points toward her cheek and I see the mark Random had left on her. It looked like it was painful. How could I have missed that?

 

After giving me no time to respond, she continues with, “It is because machines are all I can trust; they do not lie or betray. I've...learned this from first hand experience...”

 

Her last words leave a hint of an unanswered question, but I leave it as it is; no need to get her mad at me, if she could get mad at me that is.

 

As she slowly replaces the parts she working on, she says, “I had agreed to stay with Random because I thought she'd understand, that she would know where I came from when it came to working with machines. But I had been wrong, and in turn have trusted her only to be betrayed.” She continue to work on her machine, more fiercely then before however. Was that a hint of emotion she was showing? I couldn't exactly tell.

 

“Listen,” I start, slowly walking over to stand closer to her. “I understand what you mean with Random and her nightmares; I'm the only one she's told them to and have experienced them more than once.” I shuddered at the thought, which was enough to get her attention again as she abruptly stopped working and turned her head up toward me, clearly curious. I guess I had her attention now, and for that moment I felt a little closer to her. No one else had experienced Random's nightmares, so having someone other than Random to talk to about them felt...different. A good different. It made me want to sit down next to her, but I held the urge back; she was still afraid of me. I could tell by the tense atmosphere around her. So I remained standing and continued talking, hoping it would lighten the mood between us.

 

“It happened a while ago, near the end of the first year when we became BFF's. She had invited me over to spend the night as a sign of our new found friendship.” I edged a little closer to her, somehow feeling even more drawn to her. I couldn't explain it. “We decided to watch a few movies and eat some junk food; typical female-teenage-things. She then showed me around the house and even introduced me to Tipsy, who to this day still surprises me with her speaking. It wasn't till later that night after we both fell asleep on the couch that it happened.” As I continued I soon noticed I was sitting on the ground next to her. I don't know how I got there or why, but I was glad. It felt like I was towering over her and I wanted to be more at eye level with her. The wind rustled a little outside the alcove as we sat there, but it didn't seem to bother her or I; she was entranced with the story and I was happy to tell her it.

 

“I had started to stir around 3 AM, realizing I was uncomfortable. And no wonder, I fell asleep halfway off the couch.” I let out a soft laugh, but still she showed no emotion other then an intent expression painted across her face. “I had gone to the kitchen to get a glass of water before heading back to the living room to wake Random so we could go to her room. As I got back though, she was tossing and turning, gripping her hands till they turned ghost white. I didn't even notice at first that she was piercing the skin, until I saw the blood trickling,” I shuddered at the thought; I hated seeing Random like that. “Worried about her, I quickly raced to her side, only to have her be jolted awake, but not fully awake. It was almost like she was...sleep walking.” By this point Dizzy had forgotten all about her machine, full focus on me. It made me smile a little. “She tackled me to the ground and began shouting things I didn't understand as she tried to claw at me with her nails. I tried my hardest to fight her off, but it was so unexpected and I was so unprepared. That, and she was on top of me, her weight crushing my body. I had no where to go, no where to run and no way to scream because she was on my stomach, almost cutting off my breathing. When it all looked hopeless as Random raised her hand again to strike my face, I closed my eyes as Tipsy came up from behind, getting between us by jumping over me and clawing Random across the face before she could do the same to me. When she came back to her senses, shaking her head and focusing her eyes before they fell on me, I was shaking, my body chilling to the bone. And for the first time since I'd known her, I was afraid...”

 

I took a deep breath, pulled my legs to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, much like Dizzy did before. It was the first time I told anyone about that incident other than Random, and I didn't know how Dizzy had took it. But when she didn't respond, I continued, hoping that meant she wanted to hear more.

 

“I didn't talk to her for weeks after that, fearful that she'd leap out and attack again. Fearful that I had done something that night to make her mad at me, mad enough to attack like that. From my point of view, she was awake and doing it deliberately. It's a memory that's since been burned into my mind; I can't ever forget it. But after weeks of trying to talk to me despite how much I avoided her, despite how afraid of her I was, she still came and after me and eventually sat me down and told me everything as best she could, tears streaming her face the entire time. I didn't believe it at first; it was hard to believe, you know? But over the years I've gotten to know Random as one of the closet friends I've ever had or known. So I know where you're coming from; it's traumatizing when it happens first hand. But you can't blame her for how she is.”

 

When I finish she turns off to the side, all interest melting away. I couldn't tell what she was thinking, but I hope it had some impact on her. After another moment, she turned back to me and whispered, “Why? Why is she the way she is?”

 

I just shook my head. “It's a question you'll have to ask Random yourself. I safe guard all her secrets, including this one.” When I finish, I get to my feet and wipe the dirt off my dark, chocolate brown skirt. Only problem is there's no dirt. I turn toward Dizzy, clearly confused.

 

“I changed the ground around here to keep clothes from being dirtied or torn. It's how I have no need to change clothes as often.” No need to change? Has she been wearing the same clothes for days then? I didn't want to ask. She then returned to work, and I decided it was time to go. Random must have been worried sick by now with my long absence.

 

Walking toward the exit however, Dizzy calls out to me saying, “Cocoa, it was...nice meeting you. Do you have to go?”

 

At that moment, my ears must have been playing tricks on me. The last part of her sentence wasn't mono toned nor did it sound robotic; nothing but a normal, female voice sounding like she didn't want her best fried to go. A smile played at my face as I turned to face her. “I do, Random's waiting for me,” I toss my hand over my shoulder, thumb pointing toward where I came from. “I won't tell her we spoke, if that's what you're worried about. Whatever it is between you two, is between you two. Just like what we spoke about here, is between us two.” I point toward her and then back to me. Then I give her another smile, wave and head back to Random, satisfied that I managed to get something out of her. It felt like a part of me was happier than it's been in weeks.

 

“Where did you go?” Random asks me as she sees me coming around a junk mound. “I've been sitting here waiting for you to return; it's gotten dark.” She looks up toward the sky to prove her point.

 

“Sorry... I thought I found something, but it was nothing,” I toss my head back and forth, remembering the promise I made to Dizzy. “It is late, lets head back.”

 

Without another word I take her hand and pull her back toward the entrance. It was late at night and we both needed our sleep. Along the way back she didn't question me at all. I guess she trusted me. When we reached my home, I hugged her and told her I'd see her tomorrow. I felt uneasy after she left. She was a very curious person and I almost felt like she knew I was holding something back. Her curiosity may just eat away at her all night.

 

“I'm sorry Random, I'm keeping so many secrets from you...” I whisper as I head inside, wanting to do nothing but head up to my room and crash on my bed, tired from the events of today.